Five years ago today...

For some reason, this birthday of Miller's has really had me reminiscing of the first day I met the little man that changed my life forever...

I was woken up by the phone ringing. I answered and my case worker from LDS Family Services had news that Amy had gone into labor and that she was in the hospital. Amy and I had spent time together in the last weeks of her pregnancy and she invited us to be at the hospital when Miller was born.

So I got ready and packed a bag and headed to Boise. I was to be making this trip solo because Bret was at Scout camp at Red Fish Lake. He had taken the truck, so I was left home with our Jeep Wrangler with the biggest tires you've ever seen, which didn't travel well on the freeway, so I called my parents to ask if I could borrow their car for the drive. They offered to drive me so I didn't have to make the trip alone. I was grateful for that, since my mind was racing and I was really wishing that Bret could be with me. I spent the next two hours trying to get a hold of Bret with no luck.

When I arrived at the hospital, I found the waiting area where I was met by Amy's sweet mother who gave me the best hug and told me that he was here. I thought she was talking about the doctor and she looked at me again and said, "He's here, Miller is here." I was in shock. I was expecting a pretty good wait, so I wasn't really prepared to be seeing him upon arrival.

Amy's mom lead me to her room and when I walked through the door, I saw him for the first time... ...it took my breath away. I wanted to cry, I wanted laugh, I wanted to shout to world my excitement. I think what I ended up doing was just staring in silence. I can't really describe what that moment was like. The only thing that would have made it sweeter was Bret.

Amy was so gracious to allow me to be with her that day in the hospital. I remember it like it was yesterday. I followed that baby everywhere he went. Now that I work on the OB floor, I see how annoying that can be. ;)

So after many, many phone calls and a trip by the county sheriff, Bret heard the great news and headed for Boise ASAP. He finally met Miller about 12 hours after he stole my heart. We did placement the next day on the Boise Temple grounds. It was amazing. When I think about the emotions of that day, I have a hard time not crying all over again. I will never forget how my heart was overflowing with such love and joy and I could see Amy's heart breaking. I was not prepared for that. I think about that often. I will never be able to fully express my gratitude and love for her and her family.
I remember on the ride home that Bret and I kept looking in the back seat and laughing that there was a car seat with a baby in it and he was going home with us. We had dreamt of that day for so long and it was finally here. It was like when you think your dreaming so you pinch yourself to make sure it real.

Introducing Miller to our families was almost surreal. It's funny how your life can change in a day.

I can't imagine my life without Miller, and I hardly remember what my life was like before I met him five years ago. Happy birthday, Miller! I love you bunches, and bunches, and bunches, and bunches, and bunches!